Well, I have to be honest that I quite like the holidays. First of, there’re Christmas presents to look forward to. And then of course, lots and lots of “cozy and together time” with Human. Finally, the dinner time with some of our friends and relatives. I mean, I hate each of them but it’s always nice to stare at them from the top of my cat tree.
Suddenly, Human said that we’re going to compile my New Year’s Resolutions list and with her help, I ought to keep it. I had no idea why. But again, I was too curious to say NO. May be, just may be it would involve some more food, right? So, these are my New Year’s Resolutions that Human has compiled for me to keep.
1. Be more active
Be more active? What does it even mean? I love eating, napping, pooping/peeing, napping, and do some more napping. No way that I am going to be more active, no matters how many new toys Human’s going to get me this year to be more active with. No way! Just no way!
2. Be more helpful
I am, as I have always been, and will be more helpful to Human whenever she works in her home office. I mean, I’ll just walk all over her laptop or if and when I am really in the mood, I would also just be nice and sleep on it soundly. Human would never ever find another cat who’s more helpful than I am, would she?
3. Be nicer
That is a very easy New Year’s Resolutions to keep (NOT). I’ll just pretend to sleep next to or right above Human, and I’ll scratch her hair whenever I feel like it. I am sure that is what Human really means with “be nicer”. It takes a lot of effort from my part to scratch her hair after all!
4. Be more outdoorsy
Don’t give me wrong, I love going outside or cycling together with Human in my backpack but only if I feel like it, okay? The last time when we cycled together, I was not at all in the mood for being outdoorsy. Only some very yummy snacks could turn me into one a few minutes later.
5. Stop stealing
Hold the phone! Let me explain. I do not steal. I just borrow things without Human’s permission, especially when she is not around. That’s it. There are two totally different things, right? Besides, I only borrow things that are lying around the floor or if they are not, then I’ll knock them over first and then I borrow them.
Dear Human, please stop compiling a list of my New Year’s Resolutions because I have every intention to break them, one by one.
Dear readers, have a wonderful, happy and amazing New Year of 2017. If you have your own New Year’s Resolutions, keep them or break them. Just be happy with what you do!!
Sintra the Cat